At home with …Tali Magal &

“I basically spent my whole adult life trying not to get pregnant…Then when it came time to go for it, I was so surprised when it didn’t happen right away. It took us almost two years to get pregnant, and that time was so wild. I remember the sorrow every month when it didn’t happen. I was so surprised about how ‘real’ the whole biological clock thing is. When it hits, there is nothing else you can think about. We finally realized that if we wanted to make our dreams of having a family a reality, we would have to take matters into our own hands. I grew up in California and am a hippie at heart, so anything that wasn’t natural and organic seemed like it was for ‘other people’, not for me. But biology has a strong pull, and the desire to become a mother was stronger than the picture I had in my head about how things would happen. Luckily we live in a day and age where science can help. So we began the process of IVF. It luckily only took one try, and I’ll forever be grateful that we had this option available to us.”

“When we started trying, I was excited and shared with friends. But after no good news for a few months, I stopped talking about it, and friends stopped asking. I had a few close friends that I spoke with during the process about trying to conceive, but no one wants to admit that things aren’t going as we’d hoped. It is not something easily shareable. I was so used to setting my mind to something and making it happen. But this was out of my hands and wasn’t something I could control, which left me feeling a bit helpless.  It was all a very quiet and private time…

In retrospect, I wish I had not isolated myself so much during that time, as it was hard to go through it feeling alone. And only afterwards did I realize that so many others were walking a similar road.”

“We only found out that we were having twins at the THIRD sonogram. The first two sonograms only showed one baby… so when we went in to hear the heartbeat, and saw another baby up on the screen, we were in SHOCK to put it mildly. (Craig actually has a picture of my face the second they told us… it’s kind of hilarious). That moment of seeing two little tiny fetuses on the screen was incredible, but then realizing a moment later that this was actually happening inside my body and that we would actually be having TWO babies at once, I felt like the oxygen left the room. I had no mental picture of what a life with twins could be. To be perfectly honest, I just pictured utter mayhem, and my dreams of quietly rocking a baby to sleep in my arms instantly dashed. I panicked and kind of went deep into the cave and went a bit numb. I stopped talking about my pregnancy, and was a bit in denial about the whole thing. It sounds corny but it all turned around for me after a crazy pregnancy dream I had where I met them and spent a day playing with them. When I woke up, my attitude about it all had shifted, I was excited and almost elated… and from there I started learning more about twins, took a class, connected with other twin mothers and started to get really excited about what lay ahead.”

“I was one of those freaks that actually enjoyed being pregnant. I was so excited to finally know what it felt like. It was great to not have to suck in my stomach, and great pregnancy hair is real! And being able to indulge my hot chocolate cravings was fantastic (calcium!). I loved it… until the third trimester when I got huge and could barely breathe. I’m 5’2” and had two babies, two sacks, and two placentas all tucked into my body. Not gonna lie, the end sucked. I look at pictures of those final weeks and can barely believe my eyes. Nature is a crazy thing!”

“What is balance? Ha… It’s a tricky thing; I do my best to be home as much as possible when I’m prepping or wrapping jobs. So I probably get more time in with them than most working moms in between travel jobs. And when I do travel, I FaceTime with them morning and evening, and miss them terribly. I don’t think there is an easy or balanced way to be away from them, and mom guilt is real. Though knowing that the girls always have one another and aren’t alone or lonely softens the blow a teeny bit. And luckily I have a great husband who is very involved. We take turns and try to sync up our schedules as much as possible when it comes to travel so that at least one of us is with the kids while the other is away. And we also have a wonderful babysitter/nanny who is another steady presence in their lives. And while it is always tough to know that your kids are far away from you, it is such a sweet reunion and makes us feel even closer, and appreciate our time together even more so.”

“I am proud of how warm and aware my girls are. How affectionate and shiny they are. I am proud of the fact that I’ve been able to manage running a demanding business with having two girls who (so far) seem to be well adjusted and know that they are loved and cherished. I am proud of the fact that mothering feels so natural. Most of all I am honestly just proud to BE a mother. Without realizing it, it has been my life long dream, and being able to love and nurture my daughters is a joy that I am deeply grateful for. I would like to improve on staying fully focused on them and our playtime when work interjects.”

“How physically taxing it is. By the end of a day running around and physically and mentally caring for them, my body is wrecked and I barely have enough energy to flop on the couch much less plan ‘couple time’ or ‘me time’. It is all consuming.”

“Everything else! I feel honored to be their mama. It is such a true joy to wake up to their beaming faces. To witness such raw purity and sweetness everyday is incredible. And being around such beauty and love throws everything else into perspective. It is so grounding, and puts a kind of wind in my sails.”

Beauty: “Having twins means it takes more time to get them out the door, so getting myself ready needs to be quick and easy! Master the art of the high bun/top knot: It pulls your hair off your face (and out of reach of the little ones’ hands) takes two seconds to do, and makes you feel pulled together (especially when you are not!)

Skin care: I swap between Herbivore Orchid Face Oil, Vinter’s Daughter Active Botanical Serum, Aesop Parsley Seed Anti-Oxidant Serum, and Kahina Giving Beauty Argon Oil. Basically a nice smelling oil that moisturizes, works quickly, and gives you a glow. It’s all about products that multi-task. Also, just recently, I feel like I have cracked the code on skin, and it’s Dr. Barbara Sturm! She’s amazing. Her stuff is pricey, but makes such a difference! My favorite is the Hyaluronic Serum.

Makeup: As long as my skin is glowing (with help from my oils) a little bit of concealer (Chantecaille) or RMS and a swipe of cream blush and I’m good to go.

Fitness: “I sometimes watch exercise video shorts on Instagram…from bed. The truth is that I have been terrible about exercise since the girls were born. My focus now has really been on the babes and on work, so fitness is what fell to the way side. But this is the year to get back on track!”

“I am grateful everyday for my husband and his support. He is an incredible, involved and devoted father and the girls are gaga for him. Watching him with the babes is such a treat and makes him even more attractive to me. The best days really are when it is just the four of us hanging out and enjoying one another’s company. That said, we are both going at what seems like 100mph on any given day, juggling intense work schedules and responsibilities and parenthood, and at the end of the day, the truth is we are both exhausted. But we are in it together and have one another to crack up with and bounce ideas off of. The key for us has been dedicated time AWAY. It is easy to get caught up in the everyday grind and lose sight of us as just a couple. So as hard as it is to be away from the girls and give up valuable family time, we really have found that a few dedicated days of adult only ‘us-time’ is the best way to keep the sparkle and sizzle alive. Also, he is wickedly smart and funny, and he makes me laugh all day. And laughter is KEY when you are dealing with toddler twins!”

“I would say talk to your girlfriends, sisters, mothers, women! Listen to their stories… it is great to know about the million versions of what is possible. And then…LET IT ALL GO and be open to a healthy, safe delivery, however that needs to happen in your specific case. I think woman fixate on the way they want and envision their birth to go, and then end up disappointed or upset when the outcome is different. The end goal should really just be a healthy baby in your arms.”

“At 36 weeks, I suddenly showed minuscule signs of preeclampsia, which is dangerous for the mother. My blood pressure spiked, and there were signs that Baby A’s development was starting to have some issues, so they decided that the babes were far enough along to induce me. I was at a standard check up, and they wanted to admit me right then and there to start to induce labor. I knew that once you are admitted into labor and delivery you wouldn’t be able to eat anything, and I also knew that inductions could take a while. And since it was lunch time and I was starving, I asked if I could grab a meal with my husband and check in properly in a few hours. Apparently the Labor and Delivery ward was busy when I asked, so they told me to go home and check in at 8:00 PM that night. Craig and I got to have a final meal together at our favorite restaurant Locanda Verde. The maître dee actually ended up printing out our birth plan for us. And everyone waved and wished us luck as we walked out the door, fully aware that life as we knew it was about to change that night…

The standard procedure for twin births is a C-section. That is what my hospital preferred and suggested, but I was hell bent on trying to avoid that route…”

“I managed to ride out the first 12 hours of contractions without medication, but I wasn’t dilating enough, so they introduced Pitocin to speed things along. The second the Pitocin kicked in, the contractions became insanely powerful and intense. They were so painful that they knocked the wind out of me. We got an epidural at that point to help manage the pain, but somehow it was put in wrong, so only half my uterus was numbed. So I ended up riding out another 18 hours in writhing pain, on one side only. I begged to have them re-do it multiple times (I mean if I already had taken the drugs, I wanted them to actually work!), but they kept blowing me off and telling me it needed time to spread out evenly, or that it was psychosomatic. Finally after 18 hours I literally demanded that they re-do the epidural. When they finally checked, the doctor said nonchalantly ‘Oh wow, it looks like the needle was placed in a bit crooked!’ I wanted to strangle him. They fixed it and within minutes I finally had a bit of relief and took a short nap which was so helpful…”

“As soon as I was dilated nine centimeters, they had me start pushing (which in retrospect was way too soon). Pushing is exhausting, hard work, and when the time is right, it is a natural thing, you actually can’t NOT push. It is practically involuntary, so I am still baffled about why they started me so early. Finally three hours later, Baby A was in position and the contractions and pushing came naturally….They wheeled me into the operating room (standard procedure for twin births, even if you are not having a C-Section, is to deliver in the OR and not a birthing room). Our labor room was great—low lights and comfortable—while the OR felt like moving into an alien abduction center. Bright lights and what felt like 100 people all in hospital gowns and caps. Apparently it is rare to witness a vaginal twin birth, so all the residents on call had crammed in to watch. In between contractions, I asked everyone who was not essential to please leave, and what felt like half the room filed out. It was so crazy…

Then birth happened…when you are in labor, everything around you kind of fades out. Like you are alone in a room of ghosts. The support feels good, but you are so deeply in your own vessel that the rest kind of disappears out of focus. That is the only way I can describe it…”

“Baby A came out, and I remember my belly changing shape. They put her on my chest and cut the chord and all the amazing rush of feelings came and the magic and wonder was palpable. Then as they were taking her to the table to weigh her and check her out, the doctor said, ‘OK, I’m going to break your water on the second sack. Start pushing.’ That seemed ludicrous since I had just delivered a baby, and I now knew what it felt like to be ready to push and have a baby in the right position, Baby B felt like she was up in my armpit, rather than down in my pelvis in pushing position, but I pushed anyway. They gave me oxygen as I was starting to tire out after the long first delivery. After about 10 minutes of pushing, the doc said, ‘OK, one more push, if she doesn’t come out we are moving to a C-Section!’

That would have been my worst nightmare, to have to heal from both kinds of birth in one sitting, so I pulled the oxygen out of my nose, sat up and said ‘I do not want a C-Section, please just give me a few more tries!’ I shoved the oxygen back in and pushed with all my might. My Baby B was born a few pushes later (after 36 hours of labor). It was all pretty insane…”

“When all is said and done, I am proud to have done it. And when I finally had both of my tiny daughters in my arms, I feel like I exhaled as deeply as I ever have before in my life. The feeling of the deepest satisfaction and relief I have ever felt. It was as though all of our cells merged in that moment, and being a trinity was now the most natural and right thing in the world.

But man…Birth was fucking insane.

I know I could have had a scheduled 20 minute C-section and surpassed the days of labor and insanity. And in those first few days post birth when I was healing, I definitely wondered if I had made the right choice in fighting so hard against it. But at the end of the day, I am glad for the way it all worked out. My babes got the lung squeeze and all the things that I hoped for. And nature is amazing, because our bodies somehow are made for this, and return to normal and I will forever be awed and proud of what the three of us were able to do together.”

Spotify playlists for impromptu dance parties and immediate emergency mood changers if a tantrum is brewing. (Fleetwood mac “Everything” seems to be the great neutralizer lately).

Earth’s Best Chlorine Free Wipes for all things messy always

Monica and Andy Gauze Swaddles: We used them on the babes when they were infants, and now as blankets or canopies for car rides (winter or summer), babydoll blankets, shawls on a chilly day, sun shield when it’s hot, instant picnic blankets, and all purpose wipe up for the unexpected.

Weleda Skin Food: I have little green tubes of this all over. In my bag, their diaper bag, coat pockets, etc. It is great for a million different things, and smells so good.

My Nespresso Machine for easy one button coffee in the morning. The girls actually take turns helping me make my morning espresso. It’s so toddler friendly, with simple pods, levers that open and close, buttons that light up, and presto, coffee is served!

My iPhone! I don’t know how parents did this pre-smart phone! From ordering groceries, to FaceTiming family all over the world, to keeping up with work and calendars, and the endless photos and videos we take. It really is the most important tool I use.

“I wish more people were open about how intense childbirth is, and more importantly EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS JUST AFTERWARDS WHEN YOU FINALLY BRING YOUR NEWBORN HOME. I was a mess after giving birth. Physically I could barely walk for almost a month. I remember waking up drenched and bewildered from night sweats when my milk came in that first week. The cramping when you breastfeed. Learning how to tandem breast feed twins!! How exhausting and depleting breastfeeding is in general at the beginning. It all does even out after the first few weeks, and breastfeeding becomes easier (and in my case eventually wonderful), but I wish I had been more prepared by knowing what to expect. I was a physical wreck those first three weeks. All the books and focus is always on pregnancy and childbirth, so I felt like I had an idea of what to expect there, but those intense few weeks just after birth came as a real surprise.”

“Dealing with two newborn infants at once is nuts. Kind of like a game of whack-a-mole… one always needs something. The best advice I got about dealing with infant twins, is that:

1. You need to be OK with crying. It doesn’t mean something is wrong, just that the babies are trying to communicate a need, and crying is their only way to get your attention. So don’t get too charged, just try to calmly assess what they need and tend to it.
2. Always go to the baby who seems to be in more distress, and while you are feeding/ diapering/tending to her, look at your other baby and talk to them. Let the other baby know that you hear her and that you are helping her sister, but will be right with her when you are done. It sounds silly, but being able to explain to them in a calming way about what is happening always seemed to soothe both girls. And they learned about patience and taking turns from the very beginning.”

“I feel lucky to work in a field and in a job that allows me to live in fantasy. Producing shoots and commercials has taken me to some of the most stunning and inspiring places in the world with some of the most talented artists. I have had a lot of exciting moments; working intimately with famous music legends, actors, and world leaders. Lots of bucket list worthy moments, and I am grateful and truly relish each and every one of them.”

“I just want them to be grounded, aware, smart, strong, compelling humans. I want them to know their worth and to strive for the stars. I want them to nurture and revel in their special relationship as twin sisters, and to understand how important friendship and community are. They are lucky that the paradigm is shifting, and my hope is that they grow up always feeling not just equal but powerful and lucky to be women. I hope to instill a love of travel and adventure in them and help them learn to see multiple perspectives. I also hope to keep their world as diverse as possible and not to only show them the tidy parts of life. And I’d like to instill that being generous of spirit opens more doors in life.”